Dr. Blue Man

How Did You Get So Rich?

 

We stumbled on to a new show that we find fascinating.  Joan Rivers gets herself invited to wealthy peoples’ houses and asks, “how did you get so rich?”  During each episode she takes us inside the mega-mansions of everyday Americans who started out with nothing except great ideas in their heads and determination in their hearts, and turned it all into a bloody fortune. Without exception, the people she visits with are nice people that are willing to share with her their life and the struggles.  That’s right the struggles.  Not one of them made it “easily”.  There was a great deal of work, tenacity, singleness of focus, overcoming their friends and families “advice”, and in some case overcoming themselves.

On the show a couple nights ago Joan introduced us to a Croatian immigrant named Robert Herjavec who grew up with dirt floors and no running water. His hard work has paid off: He now has his own 55,000-suqare-foot home with his own ballroom to dance in, paints his walls with liquid gold and swims laps in an indoor pool that he doesn’t heat! Some people may call that frugal or thrifty but she called it cheap and chilly! He also has seven different Lamborghinis, each in a different color for every day of the week.

She also interviewed  the inventor of the five-chamber bubble blower who is so rich his dog has a walk-in closet and a private chef. This pampered pooch also has a psychiatrist because at times, he gets stressed out.

A number of “commonalities” have hit me.  They all have done it “on their own”.  None of them have had a job and lived on less than they made to get rich.  All of them own something.  Almost all are “rags to riches” stories or at relative to where they are now.  All of them “left the good for great”.  Some wanted to be rich and set the goal.  Others did what they loved doing and got rich.  Some were inventors- which means they recognized a need and built something to fill it.  Others found a business system and maximized it for them.  Most of us are held hostage by our choices which include our choice of making a living.  It seems to me that most people live on “fixed income”.  Let’s think about that.  Fixed income by definition means that your income is fixed- it can not go up or down- it is fixed.  Most of the time that term is used when it applies to government pay but don’t most that have a job live on fixed income?  The answer unfortunately is yes.   

 

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WORDS - Less is more

 

I was thinking about the power of words recently.  There are some words that can bring a tear to your eye.  There are words that can get you angry.  Some words can even create action.  So I decided to look at some famous documents for fun.

 

Abraham Lincoln's Gettysburg Address, which has defined our nation, is all of 268 words.

 

The Declaration of Independence runs about 1,300 words.

 

The Constitution, which has served us for more than two centuries, comes to some 5,000 words.

 

The Holy Bible has about 773,000 words.

 

The famous novel, A Dance to the Music of Time by Anthony Powels has more than 1,000,000 words.

 

The federal income tax code and all its attendant rules and regulations: 9 million words and rising.

 

I think that less is more - don’t you?

 

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Keep Your Mind Tuned to the Success Station - CHANGE THE STATION

 

In Chris Widener’s blog he writes that we need to keep our mind tuned to the success station.  He uses the analogy of a radio station to illustrate how our thinking can be improved by listening to positive rather than negative stuff.  A couple of thoughts occurred to me that I wanted to share. 

 

Many of us grow up listening to the radio, the question is what station?  Perhaps you grew listening to WYCDT (You Can’t Do That).  When you tried to ride your bike you were told YCDT.  When you tried to make the varsity team you were told YCDT.  When you wanted to go to college, get a nice car, and start a business… you were told YCDT.  Well that radio program needs to change so CHANGE THE STATION.

 

Maybe you grew up WYCHT (You can’t have that).  When you wanted your first bike or Barbie you were told YCHT or we can’t afford that.  When you wanted a new outfit you were told YCHT.  Maybe it was an Xbox, computer, iPod, cell phone… CHANGE THE STATION.

 

The station you choose to listen to is your choice.  No one can force you to listen to a particular station.  If you don’t like what is playing CHANGE THE STATION!

 

We live in a world today were we are bombarded with messages and experts tell us most of them are negative.  It is not easy to find the positive stations, but they are out there so if you are listening to negative - CHANGE THE STATION.

 

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Gift or Skill - What's the difference?

I was recently told that I “had a great gift with people”.  My first response in my mind was “you’ve got to be kidding” because I remember all the faux pas, wrong words at the wrong time and all the times that I have just felt totally out of place in a social setting.  But I think this concept raises a great teaching point and that is that people skills are a SKILL not a gift.

 

Webster defines a gift as “natural abilities or qualities or something acquired without compensation”.  For most of us, the ability to deal with people is not natural in any way, as a matter of fact; most of us find it very unnatural. To me it is an important distinction because if I accepted the ‘fact” that it was a gift I would be forced to accept the breadth and depth of my existing abilities.   On the other hand, if I accept the fact that it is a skill that can be developed and perfected like other skills such as painting, running, sports, etc. and recognize there is room for improvement, I can decide to improve.

 

So then, what are people skills and how are they developed?  In my view, people skills are the abilities to build relationships with a wide variety of people, in other words being relatable.  So how is this done?  One of the first steps is to be willing to get out of your comfort zone.  Your comfort zone by definition is comfortable but there is no growth while there.  We all have people that we feel more “comfortable” with than others.  The biggest reason for this is there is a common ground to build on.  Perhaps it is your church and beliefs.  Perhaps it your ethnicity or gender.  Perhaps it is educational or socioeconomic background.  When you meet someone new the goal is to build some level of common interest.  The best way I know how to do this is by asking questions and finding out about them and then sharing something about you.  Have you ever met someone that was easy to talk with?  Have you ever met someone that you immediately felt comfortable with?  Why?  My guess is that you and they found a common ground.  My suggestion is for you to mirror that activity because it works.

 

I have developed 3 people principles that I believe are pretty universal regardless of age, geography, education, etc. 

 

People Principle #1 - People would rather buy than be sold.  Think about your own experiences.  Think about a really good sales experience you had as a consumer.  It doesn’t matter if you were buying a house, car, or ice cream cone.  What made it good?  Now, think about a negative one.  Again, it does not matter if you were buying a house, car, or ice cream cone.  What made it bad?  For most of us, in the good experience we felt like we were in control; in the negative we felt like weren’t.

So my question to you as it relates to YTB is, are you selling or helping people to buy?  If it is the former my guess is you are not optimizing the opportunity.  If you help people buy you are really helping solve THEIR problems (not yours).   My personal experience validates this.  There were a number of people that I tried to close by letting them know if they bought their site right now I would qualify for my weekly bonus.  Would you like to guess how many I closed?  Let me help you-exactly zero.  Why because I was selling not helping people buy.  Why because I was focused on me and not them.  Again, let me ask you the question- are you helping people buy or selling?

 

People Principle #2 - People are more interested in their own agenda than yours.  In a previous post we looked at Gran Torino and how there are people skills lessons everywhere.  In that movie, Clint Eastwood’s son comes over and lets him know that he believes he (Eastwood) would be better off moving in to a senior citizen center.  You could visibly see Eastwood react negatively.  Who wouldn’t when being told what to do? Not having very good people skills, the son did not pick up on that and progresses to tell Eastwood why- because he won’t have to cut his own grass (which he loves doing) or shovel the drive in the winter.  Eastwood gets angrier.  Again, the son pushes forward and lets him know that he has actually done research and come up with some choices.  Eastwood simply throws him out of the house.

 

Let’s replay that scene with a little people knowledge.  First, if Eastwood’s son would have started with a question like “have you thought about moving in to a senior center?” he likely would have gotten a different result because Eastwood would have responded by saying that he did not want to have anything to do with them.  End of conversation.  If Eastwood had actually considered it, he would have said yes it may be a good idea and a conversation would have ensued with a resolution that was good for both he and his son.  As it was, there was a further disintegration in their relationship because the son started with his own agenda and not his father’s.

 

Let me ask you to consider whose agenda are you starting with yours or theirs?  If you start the conversation with “I am excited…..” I would suggest you are starting with yours not theirs.  Start with a question about how they are doing and if they have figured what is going on with the economy (you can guess what people say to that at this time).

 

People principle #3- People don’t know themselves as well as they think they do.  At seminars that I have done around the country I have asked “how many of you have said at one point that you would never get involved with a network marketing company?”  Without exception, it is always at least 50%.  That means 1 out of 2 have said “no” and now they are a “yes”.  How does that happen?  For some, it is the economy that is driving them to do something that they said they would never do or never do again.  For others, it is the success of a friend in our business.  For still others, it is the YTB business model and the fact that we don’t have inventory or quotas.  Polite persistence is the answer.  Notice the first word-polite.  It is not a constant hourly or daily barrage.  It isn’t calling weekly and saying “are you ready yet”. It is our job to find out where they are, answer their questions, and find a way to add value to their lives.  Keep in mind that not everyone will join our team and it doesn’t matter how often you ask.

 

Remember…we are ultimately in the people business.  Our job is to find people that are open to our system. Our job is to improve ourselves and learn to reach out to more and more people.  Our job is to connect to more people.  Our job is to find ways to add value to others’ lives.  Our job is to help our team reach their goals.

   

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